By now, my three faithful followers must know how obsessed I am with grocery store stories, and food marketing in general. Having worked in retail for over a decade, I’ve held my share of inedible jobs, but I keep coming back to grocery.

One thing I always found amusing while stocking shelves – besides finding lingerie hanging from the glass door in Frozen foods – was discovering discarded shopping lists and taking a peek into the personal eating habits of my customers.

I remember one list from 4 years ago, that still brings a smile… someone was apparently throwing a party, because the list went something like this: Fritos, ranch dip, Pepsi, ice, Styrofoam plates, napkins, utensils, trash bags, hamburgers + hot dogs, buns, ice-cream, and so forth. Until you reach the bottom of the paper, and the final item listed was… aspirin!
LMAO! I seriously hope, after all that, they didn’t forget their headache medicine (since they lost their list)! I’d rather see them run back to the store for hot dog buns. 😛

I also enjoy misspelled items on grocery lists, like my recent favorite: CornPoops.
Perhaps that’s a pet nickname for their cereal?

Today I will share a list that I wrote this morning:
1. Strawberry Pop-tarts
2. Betty Crocker Yellow Cake Mix
3. Mountain Dew
4. Vanilla Jell-O
5. Frosted Flakes
6. Chex Mix
7. Kit Kaboodle (cat food)
8. Sunmaid raisins
9. S.O.S. Lemon steel-wool pads
10. Miller’s Lite 24 pack
11. Gilette deodorant
12. Nair hair removal
13. Prilosec
14. Jewish Songs My Mother Sang to Me

This, however, is NOT my actual grocery shopping list! LOL This is the Etsy feature I promised weeks ago, but was derailed by a more serious cause to blog about. (see: Sammy)

IvyLaneDesigns on Etsy creates spiral-bound journals from just about any material! CD and VHS cases, candy wrappers, board game covers, although like me, she especially seems drawn to the packaging from our favorite grocery items. Browsing her Etsy shop is like taking a trip to your corner market, except it’s less crowded… the only spills called for clean-up belong to your own family… and you don’t need to worry about getting stuck with a dead battery on your motorized cart (2 miles away from the check-out lanes).
So grab your shopping cart and let’s hit the aisles, shall we?

Since Halloween is just around the corner, General Mills is bringing out their limited time monster cereals: Check out the Booberry Cereal Journal:

Booberry Cereal Journal - $12.00

Booberry Cereal Journal - $12.00

Here’s some Minute Maid Limeade that doesn’t need refrigeration:

Minute Maid Limeade Journal - $8.00

Minute Maid Limeade Journal - $8.00

I’m trying to figure out what you could possibly write inside a Tabasco sauce journal;
the pages are incredibly narrow… the phone numbers of hot and spicy dates? –
Aha! Grocery Lists!

Tabasco Mild Jalapeno Journal - $5.00

Tabasco Mild Jalapeno Journal - $5.00

I actually have this box of Mrs. Paul’s Fish Sticks in my own freezer:

Mrs. Paul's Fish Sticks Journal - $12.00

Mrs. Paul's Fish Sticks Journal - $12.00

Here’s a microwavable Stouffer’s journal that’s ready in 6 minutes:

Stouffer's Spinach Souffle Journal - $8.00

Stouffer's Spinach Souffle Journal - $8.00

For the folks who want their recycled journals to be healthy as well, we have the Silk Soymilk (fortified for kids):

Vanilla Silk Soymilk Journal - $8.00

Vanilla Silk Soymilk Journal - $8.00

No blog about grocery items would be complete without adding a bit of humor for my good old work buddies. We recently had a display of Sweetzel’s Spiced Wafers that was torn down, and the remaining stock sat in the backroom for ….erm…. awhile, waiting for someone to find it a permanent home.
So I pay tribute to our homeless wafers with this journal:

Sweetzel's Spiced Wafer Journal - $8.00

Sweetzel's Spiced Wafer Journal - $8.00

Here’s another Inside Joke…. when our Goya section is empty for weeks, we can blame IvyLane. She hijacked our shipment to create Goya yellow rice journals:

Goya Yellow Rice Journal - $8.00

Goya Yellow Rice Journal - $8.00

Wait! Does the thought of eating paper products all day make you constipated? Forget your Cornpoops? Never fear, come with me to the HBA aisle, and pick up a copy of the Enema Laxative Journal:

Enema Laxative Easy-to-Use Journal - $10.00

Enema Laxative Easy-to-Use Journal - $10.00

(pssst) For us ladies, certain feminine products usually make monthly appearances on our shopping lists, so while we’re here… don’t forget the Tampon Playtex Journal:

Playtex Beyond Tampon Journal - $8.00

Playtex Beyond Tampon Journal - $8.00

What better way to keep track of playdates than with Playtex? But for those of you who find tampons invasive or uncomfortable, she also carries more modest pads:

Always Ultra Thin Journal - $12.00

Always Ultra Thin Journal - $12.00

Guys! Here’s a journal Just For You!

Just For Men Hair Journal - $8.00

Just For Men Hair Journal - $8.00

And this Condom Journal might just be the new version of that little black book!
All your ladies will be flattered to have their digits recorded in here:

Naturalamb Lubricated Journal - $7.00

Naturalamb Lubricated Journal - $7.00

Hey! We must be shopping in Wal-Mart, cause we’ve stumbled upon the lingerie!
This journal is Just My Size, and its spiral binding boasts “magic” rings of comfort:

Just My Size Support Bra Journal - $10.00

Just My Size Support Bra Journal - $10.00

She also has some kid-friendly journals in her shop; this Crayola crayon box journal is rather cute for aspiring young artists:

Crayola 24 Pack Journal - $5.00

Crayola 24 Pack Journal - $5.00

Disclaimer: The prices quoted here may be subject to change without notice in her shop… I’m not going to edit my blog every time she has a sale. Hell, I was too lazy to make sale signs in my own store, half the time. Also, these prices don’t reflect the retail value of the items found in your grocery store. LOL (A box of cereal hasn’t reached $8.00 YET!)
I’m also not going to held accountable for her blatant infringement of the various companies’ copyrights… I’ve provided links to her shop with each item; let them find her and eat cake!

As of 10/20/09, at the time this blog was written, she had 22 pages of listings (over 400 items total)… and I didn’t make it to the very end. 😦
I was rather hoping to find my Good Friends cereal, or Akmak crackers… but I’m certain if she eats Good Friends, their smiling faces will eventually find a place on her Etsy shelves.
Doubtful about the CornPoops though….

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